motherhood confessions

Confessions from a new mom:

- I consider it an accomplishment if I manage to shower every other day.
- My hands are often chapped from frequent hand washing to avoid germs.
- I ate dinner tonight in bed with my plate balanced on my left leg and a crying Natalie lying in my right arm.
- I secretly rejoice when Natalie has a poopy diaper when Matt has diaper duty (because it means I missed a dirty one)!
- My first thought every morning when I wake up is, "is she still breathing?" If I wake to her sounds or crying, I immediately feel relieved.
- I'd be embarrassed if anyone I knew saw the inside of our house in its current condition (except my parents -- they've already seen it).
- Our inside Christmas decorations are still up, including the Christmas tree and a few opened gifts underneath.
- Flowers I received the day after Natalie was born are still in the vase on the kitchen counter, exactly where they were placed when we came home from the hospital (and they're now rotting).
- I ask myself nearly every day, "Am I a good mother?"
- When we packed our big suitcase for our February trip to Tennessee, we had to get the suitcase out of the floor (with clothing still in it) from our December trip to Tennessee.
- I love how more polite people seem to be when you are pushing a stroller around. They'll stop so you can cross the street, hold a door open for you, etc.
- When we're out in public and my hair is dirty and crazy and I'm without makeup, I wonder if strangers ask themselves, "how did such a pretty baby come from that woman?"
- I'm thankful God didn't give me twins!

These are a few of my confessions as a new mom with my sleepy baby napping against me. I'm afraid to move from this position in fear of waking her.

Motherhood is far different than I imagined, but I know I will have earned the title of "mom" the first time I hear Natalie say, "I love you, mommy." In the mean time, I'll enjoy continuing to grow into these huge motherhood shoes as I learn to be the best mom I know how to be.

There are things I've accomplished in my lifetime that I'm proud of, but nothing has ever made me so proud as watching Natalie develop. Her favorite thing to do right now is to attempt raising into a sitting position on her own. She gets so frustrated when she can't. I'll never forget how proud she looked when she stood up (with assistance) from a seated position for the first time. That big grin worked its way right into my soul, and I was unbelievably proud of my baby girl who is already trying to be a big girl.

These past few months have had some big ups and downs, but with every smile from that sweet face, I fall deeper and deeper in love. Life will never be the same as it once was before Natalie joined us, but I like this life better. She's a keeper.

Unremarkable beauty

It has been a while since my last post, and much has transpired between now and then. I didn't have time for blogging since we were in the final weeks before Natalie's arrival. We finally completed the nursery just in time for her birth, and I may share a post about the nursery at a later time, but first things first.

We are now officially a family of three. Our beautiful Natalie was born via c-section and weighed 7 lbs., 13 oz. and was 20.5 inches long. Her lungs, just like the rest of her, are strong and she greeted us immediately with loud cries. She has already earned herself a nickname -- Squeaky. When she cries hard, she makes a little squeak sound. It is beyond adorable! We noticed it first thing, but it was actually one of the nurses who first called her Squeaky.

A lot of women have remarkable stories of pregnancies and deliveries. However, what makes Natalie so remarkable is just how unremarkable her nine month preparation for birth turned out to be. This is the part worth sharing.

I am amazed at how strong Natalie is. I believe with all of my heart that the strength God placed within her is what led her safely and soundly on her journey to my arms. I was told early on in the pregnancy that Natalie would likely end up in NICU and that the doctors would be happy if I could at least make it to 36 weeks before having to deliver her. As far back as the first trimester, based on the potential risks the doctors explained to me, I feared the worst and prepared myself for the possibility of Natalie being born way too early and having to fight for her life. I was high risk for pre-eclampsia (due to chronic high blood pressure) and gestational diabetes. And though I did in fact develop gestational diabetes, it was not until about 28 weeks, and the doctors expected me to develop it much sooner. Twenty-eight weeks is around the standard time most women develop it anyway.

According to the medical field, Natalie shouldn't have arrived as a healthy little baby. Fortunately, God doesn't work for the medical field! It is by His grace alone that Natalie never saw one moment in NICU and was delivered a few days before her estimated due date without any problems. It brings joyful tears to my eyes when I think about all the times throughout my pregnancy when I worried over whether or not we would have to deliver her early and how God had it all under control every step of the way. We were already having monthly ultrasounds since high blood pressure can cause the baby to grow more slowly than normal. After I developed gestational diabetes and was insulin dependent, I was warned of the risk that issue raises of the baby being stillborn. At that time, we moved from monthly ultrasounds to weekly ones, called a biophysical profile, where Natalie needed to pass eight criteria. Once this began, we also had weekly non-stress tests to monitor Natalie's heart rate and movements. And with all of the precautionary measures, Natalie was doing well every single time, every visit! She passed all of the non-stress tests and scored an 8 out of 8 on all of her biophysical profiles, and she was right where she needed to be every time with her growth. Despite all the concern for potential problems, it was a mostly uneventful pregnancy.

I had prepared myself a long time ago for a c-section delivery. I felt in my heart that she would arrive a few weeks early by c-section. However, I was expecting the c-section to be the result of pre-eclampsia and not simply failure to progress, which is not dangerous like pre-eclampsia is. Natalie was our little fighter -- even when my blood pressure kept dropping and dropping during labor, her heart rate stayed strong. The epidural caused my blood pressure to drop to around 75/30, and the nurse had to call the anesthesiologist to get authorization to give me more meds when she had unsuccessfully exhausted the amount she was allowed to give. Despite this, Natalie wasn't impacted by the major change in blood pressure. When it was finally stabilized again, and we realized that I was still dilated at 5 cm after several hours, we decided it was best to proceed with a c-section while Natalie and I were both still doing well.

Not too long after that, our precious Natalie took her first breaths as she was welcomed into our world. Everyone always says how babies are miracles, and I realize even more so now just how true that is. It is amazing how God allows us to experience the joy of such tiny miracles. I don't know why God decided to pour out His grace on Natalie and on us, but every time I look into her sweet eyes, I will be reminded of His great blessing and thank Him for giving me the honor and privilege of being the mother to such a special little girl. Natalie's story could have easily had a different ending if God had willed it. But I am so thankful He decided to give us such an unremarkable, yet beautiful, experience these past nine months that resulted in a tiny child who lights up our lives in a way nothing else can.

 "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." - Jeremiah 1:5

a labor of love

I was sooo excited today about this completed project, and then life got in the way, and I nearly forgot to blog about it!

I must admit -- this is by far my favorite nursery project (even though I was involved in it the least!). I will give you a little background about why ...

In the late 1980s, Matt's father constructed a small dresser that went on to be used in their home and eventually moved on with Matt when he got his first apartment here. That dresser migrated on over to our home after we got married.

After we selected Natalie's nursery furniture, I came up with the great idea (great for me, since I didn't have to do the work, ha!) to strip and stain the dresser to match the cherry wood color of Natalie's stuff. Neither of us were quite sure how it would turn out, and I think Matt gained several new gray hairs throughout the process while I sat back asking him (constantly) when he was going to work on it and/or finish it.

But alas, it is done!

Here is the journey:

 I don't have a good before shot of the dresser because I forgot to take one, but you can see pretty much what it looked like in the picture to the right.

First, he stripped the dresser and drawers with mineral spirits to remove the wax coating.

 

 Then he had to sand everything to give it a smooth finish and ready for staining.

 As with most projects, the daddy-to-be came back into the house wearing the remains of his hard work!

Once the dresser and drawers were smooth, Matt stained them a lovely cherry color.

You may recall a blog post back from August about drawer knobs. Well, I decided to try painting some myself to save some bucks since I couldn't find any I liked at a cheap price. So after looking around at some of the ones I liked on Etsy.com, I came up with the design to the right.















So after this part was completed, they were ready to be attached to the dresser! More work for the daddy-to-be!  And finally, the finished product!! Great job, daddy-to-be!!

So this is why I love this project so much! It turned out better than I had expected, and it makes it so much more special since Natalie's grandpop constructed the dresser, her daddy refinished the dresser, and her mommy hand painted the drawer knobs for it. Furniture made with love!
  
After many corny (and therefore, rejected!) blog title suggestions from Matt, I finally selected the blog title to this post as he suggested.

another crafty adventure

Oh September, where did you go?

Penny, the dust maker!

The end of the month is nearing, and this is my first post of the month! Total slacker, right? Actually, September has been a busy month for us! It all began with a mega-cleaning event that was highly necessary after all the neglect the house received during my many sick weeks of pregnancy. I think Penny (our fluffier feline) is to blame for the amount of dust, kitty hair, etc. that accumulated on and in every little thing! This cleaning adventure resulted in allergies and triggered daily sinus headaches. At least the house looks much better!

After that, we had family visiting back-to-back. My parents came to town to redo the shelving in our master closet and to spend Labor Day weekend relaxing by the pool (after all the hard work was done!). Their visit was followed a few days later by my sisters-in-law and parents-in-law! It was a mini family reunion since we had not all been together at the same time since Matt and I married last year! Matt's mom made a turkey and ham with all the fixings while they were here. Thanksgiving in September! They also brought lots of awesome gifts for Natalie!

Besides that, September has been filled with doctor visit after doctor visit. Natalie and I are both doing well -- they're just keeping a closer eye on us since we are nearing the finish line in case any problems arise. Better safe than sorry! We haven't seen her in three weeks, but we expect her to be over 3 pounds by now. We'll see our little girl on Thursday, though! She is still a mover and a shaker, and she gave me two good kicks while her daddy was playing guitar in the church service Sunday morning and several kicks while he was talking to her through my belly last night. I think she likes hearing her daddy!

Before shot of shelf after the four
pegs had been removed.

We have also been busy working on Natalie's nursery. I am so happy with its progress! I wanted to share with you one of the projects we recently completed that was a mommy-daddy team effort! (I must admit, mostly daddy, though!) It all began with a $5 unfinished wooden shelf we found on clearance at Michael's. The wheels started turning from there.

Matt used an orbital sander to
smooth out any rough places.

First on the list - whip this cheapy shelf into shape! Here's where daddy came into play. He used an orbital sander to prepare the shelf for staining and to get rid of any rough spots on the shelf. And since I can't use staining products, Matt took care of the next part too -- making the shelf a nice dark cherry color to match the rest of Natalie's furniture.

Staining shelf.

Supplies to finish the shelf.

Attaching paper to shelf with mod podge

Once the shelf was stained and a coat of polyurethane was added, it was time for a crafty touch! We needed a way to hide the peg holes since the butterfly hooks we planned to add to the shelf wouldn't hide them without having to space the butterflies unevenly. The easiest and quickest solution we came up with was to cover them with scrapbook paper. I selected one of the light colored patterns I used for the name letters I made earlier for her room. This gave a nice contrast between the dark butterflies and wood and solved our problem! I used my trusty old mod podge to attach the paper to the shelf after cutting the paper to the appropriate dimensions. And mommy's brief role in the shelf transformation was complete!

Shelf with scrapbook paper attached.

Finally, we could attach the butterfly hooks! We found these at Hobby Lobby and purchased them for $5 each when they were on sale for 50% off. Nana had to come to the rescue when our local store only had one. She found two more for us at her Tennessee Hob Lob (as Matt likes to call it). This was the biggest expense for the shelf ($15 for all three), but it was worth it! Matt attached the butterflies with some epoxy glue (after much warning from the over-the-top preggo maniac wife to make sure he spaces them evenly). And here's the finished product ...

Done!

Let me tell you, it looks GREAT in her room! Every time I turn around, I am so impressed with all the work Matt has done for the nursery and continues to do. Natalie will hopefully appreciate it one day when she is old enough to understand how much love has been poured into her room, not just by her parents, but by all of her grandparents and aunts! She is one blessed little girl!

Stay tuned for an upcoming post about Matt's biggest nursery project! It turned out beautifully, and I cannot wait to share!

sewing tears

The finished table cover.

Look to the right at my gorgeous, professional-quality table top cover -- hand-sewn to perfection. ... Ok, I am having one of those crazy pregnancy dreams again. See below for the actual story.

This blog post has been brewing for several days now. I've been planning to get to it, but alas, here I finally am. I was reminded a few days ago of just how human I really am. I would love to log into my blog and type away an award winning post about how all of my crafting projects turn out to be masterpieces.

I found this photo of the cruel merciless machine.
Sewing on the floor -- smart, eh?

Instead, I find myself here laboring over the keyboard, painfully eyeing my new enemy just a few feet from me on the floor. This heavy white contraption with a name tag of Kenmore mocks my every glance. Some may refer to this utterly disgraceful piece of equipment as a sewing machine -- I refer to it as my arch-nemesis!

Battles with sewing machines aren't a new thing for my family. It runs in our blood. I became a little more like my mother when my battle began a few days ago. I'm not sure if my mom and I both purchased our sewing machines from the same cursed batch, but both have led to tears.  It may just be the pregnancy hormones, but I fussed at mom because we had a miscommunication about how I was supposed to sew something, and I cried about the mishap afterward. Now I understand why she despises sewing.

Even Penny felt my pain.

I haphazardly made it through one small sewing project (just don't check to see if the seams are straight!). When explaining my struggles afterward to mom with this project, we had a good laugh over what led to my (far) less than perfect creation. I guess it is safe to assume that sewing pins to hold the fabric in place would have been an intelligent investment!

The project - to sew a small table cover to hide
this table top. Got a great deal on it at
Hobby Lobby! Paid $24 for a $70 table.

In reality, I realize I cannot blame any sewing machine for my inabilities. The last time I truly sewed anything substantial was a pair of boxers in home economics class my freshman year of high school (nearly 12 years ago). And let me tell you - they were nothing to write home about. So I stand by my response when my mom questioned me many years ago on how I will sew, cook, iron, etc. for my family when I don't have the skills to do so -- let momma do it. When Natalie gets here, I will make sure she knows how much better Nana is at sewing so she can run to Nana and ask her to make her Halloween and school play costumes. Oh what fun Nana will have! (Better her than me, right?)

On an unrelated note -- I think it is safe to officially say now that I am over being sick! In the past few weeks, I've only gotten sick two or three times. I'm feeling like my old self again - except for this crazy feeling in my belly that feels like an organ pulsing sporadically.

crafting a name

Two posts back to back! Can you tell that I am feeling better? I even cooked a nice dinner before Matt went in to work today, and I got all of his stuff packed and ready to go for him. It feels like old times again. Could I finally be in that 2nd trimester "honeymoon" that I have heard wonderful things about but thought would never get here for me? Better late than never though.

Today has been a nice day. Nothing extraordinary, really, but sometimes that's what makes it all the better - just me and hubby going through life together. He met up with one of the guys from church today to run through some music for the Sunday morning service. Our main pastor and choir director are both on vacation this week, so the assistant pastor will be delivering the sermon while the guys take care of the music. Matt had a fun time practicing with Josh and getting to know him better (he just proposed this week to his girlfriend!).

After he got home, we ran out to the grocery store for a few things, particularly alfredo sauce so that I could make dinner. We are weirdos and actually enjoy grocery shopping and seeing what cool things they have. (Hey, at least it is free entertainment, even if it is just a grocery store!) Matt was surprised that I was feeling up to cooking an entire meal, but I have felt really good today. It seems a little silly, but I am so happy to have days where I feel like the pre-preggo Misty and can be a true helpmate to my husband.

And now I will stop rambling and get on to what I wanted to post about. One of our Natalie room projects is completed, and I am excited to share the results because I was pleased with how it turned out. Sometimes the ideas I have in my head don't quite translate out well when I try to craft something up, but this turned out pretty much the way I intended.

I wanted to put Natalie's name on one of her walls, even though it is no longer a unique idea since everyone seems to do this with their nurseries. I decided the best way to possibly give this typical decor idea a little individuality would be to decorate the letters with different patterns and colors of scrapbook paper, based on the theme colors of her room, and add some little details to each letter to give some extra pizazz.



These are most of the supplies I used, plus some acrylic paint, mod podge, and glue dots (a scrapbooker's best friend). In addition, I already had a cutting board, paint brush, and other decals/stickers in my craft supply. So the only supplies I bought in addition to what you see here is the paint. This made the project total around $15 because I hit up Hobby Lobby when they had all of the items in the picture 50% off.

First, I painted the edges around each side of the letter and a little around each edge on the top part. Like all Misty projects, I wasn't expecting this one to turn out perfectly (believe it or not!), so I thought painting the letter a similar color to the paper may help hide any flaws. After that, I used the cutting board to cut the appropriate shapes. (This was the most challenging part). Then, it is all easy after that! I used mod podge to glue the paper to the chipboard letter. This gives a good bond between the two without having to worry about the wrinkles caused by typical glue (just as long as you keep the layer thin).



Smooth any bubbles or wrinkles out and let dry!

Here is the N after it is all finished:

And here is the end result (you can click on the picture to see a larger version) after the details were added to each letter using glue dots. If you have a good eye for detail, you may notice that a few of the wooden shapes added to the letters are painted differently than they were in the original picture. I changed three of them up just a bit to make them fit in a little better with the color scheme I was going for.

Some of these colors may hint at her theme colors, but we will show more of that later once things start coming together! This was a really fun project and relatively easy. We have a few other projects we will soon be working on, so stay tuned to see if they are delightful or disasters!

over halfway to the finish line

Can someone please tell me where the time has gone? In the beginning of my pregnancy, it seemed like each day and week dragged on. I couldn't wait to hit the 12 week mark and feel a little more secure with things, but it felt like an eternity. Now, I feel like I could blink, and our baby girl will be there in my arms.

I am over half way through with this baby growing thing, and I may be even closer than I think, depending on when she decides to make an appearance (or the doctors decide to take her). For several weeks now, I have felt the flutters and stuff women speak of. But between week 20 and 21, Natalie started to make her presence known a little more. It still feels light and gentle. Matt has tried to feel her little sudden movements, but it is still too early.

Her nursery is well underway, and Matt and I both have projects to work on for it. I will share some pictures of our projects once we get started! It is so much fun seeing it all come together.

In the mean time, here is a photo of her grandfather practicing for when he will hold his first grandchild.



I cannot wait until our Natalie is here, and I can watch her daddy interact with her. It touches my heart in ways I cannot express each night when he puts his lips against my belly and gives it a kiss while he tells Natalie how much we love her and to take it easy on me when the sickness has caused a not so pleasant day for me. I enjoy listening as he briefly talks to her about whatever comes to his mind, and my thoughts wonder off to those not-too-distant days when we can not only talk to her but hold her close, and tell her how precious she is to us.

When Matt plays his guitar and sings, I wonder if she knows it's her daddy she hears. When her grandparents help work on her nursery or stock up on diapers and other supplies so she will have everything she needs, I wonder if she knows yet how much she is already loved. When her mommy is eating her favorite foods, I wonder if she is enjoying the taste of them as well.

Natalie probably doesn't know it yet, but she is truly a blessed girl. She has an entire team of family behind her, awaiting her arrival and the chance to show her love. When she makes her debut, she will complete our lives even more and give our hearts a new reason to dance.

pretty in pink

Matt and I had the opportunity to experience something wonderful together this week.

No, it wasn't a trip to Hershey, PA where we ate our weight in chocolate at the factory (that was only a dream). Nor did we receive notice from Matt's place of business that, due to his outstanding work performance, they decided to graciously double his salary [though, he did actually receive a small raise recently, praise God!].

This experience was even better. Right up there close to the day I married the cute redhead with glasses.

On Wednesday, we discovered our lives will soon be blessed with a darling baby girl. [Let's hear it for the Pink Team!] As all soon-to-be parents, our main desire is for our growing baby to simply be a healthy newborn. But the selfish part of us sometimes also hopes for a particular gender. You can count me amongst this selfish group. I was totally rooting for the Pink Team. Would I have been just as happy if the ultrasound technician had pointed to some barely visible thing on the TV screen resembling boy parts and said, "Looks like a boy!"? Well, of course! Boy or girl, this child is and will be loved just the same. Even so, I am so thrilled and honored to hold this precious girl within me.

We wanted to have a little fun on our ultrasound day, so we wore these shirts in jest:



I don't think it began to sink in until after the ultrasound was complete that this baby (who we no longer have to refer to as an "it") is a girl. It had been almost six weeks since we last saw our sweet girl via ultrasound, so I am always anxious to see that she is doing well. I said a quick prayer just before the technician started that the tiny child inside of me would be doing well. That prayer was answered, and now I have to be faithful for four more weeks until the next one that God will watch over her in a way that I am unable to.

I did a little dance when we stepped out of the ultrasound room. Matt calls this the "Misty dance". The ultrasound was finished, and I could finally let it sink in that in four months (or less), I will be holding a tiny bundle of pink bliss in my arms. Completely amazing.

After we left the doctor's office, our first stop was baby GIRL clothes shopping! We each picked out an outfit for Natalie.

Here was Matt's choice:



Since I was a young girl, when I always thought about my future, the vast part of that vision included a husband and children. I have wanted to be a wife and mother my entire life. I recall a time in college when I had the realization that it truly didn't matter what I did with my life career-wise. Some people define themselves by what they do for a living. And that's ok, if that is what they desire. I realized then (and it still holds true today) that I wanted my life to be defined by the kind of wife and mother I am, and by how I represent who and what I believe. Family has and always will be more important to me than some outstanding, respectable career could ever be. In other words, I want to work to live, not live to work.

With that being said, our growing girl is definitely one of the biggest blessings in my life, and it is truly a humbling experience that God has allowed me the privilege to be her mother and to be the one to help usher her into life. I know raising a child will be no walk in the park. Brandi, who is such a sweet and dear friend, is the mother of three children who are all 5 and under, and constantly reminds me of this. Ha! However, I just cant help but sit here and get lost in the thought of how beautiful it will be to see our little girl smile and laugh. I think that is what I look forward to the most. Children have the most heart warming smiles and laughter.

I could go on and on (imagine that!), but I will stop with one final thing. During the five years we dated, Matt and I often talked and dreamed of our future life together and the children we would share. We picked out a boy and a girl name before we were even engaged! Now that those dreams are a reality, we are able to put one of those names to use. Our baby girl will be Natalie Elisabeth. Natalie was chosen simply because we like the name, and it is a family name on Matt's side. Elisabeth is how Elizabeth is spelled in German and was chosen in honor of my German grandmother who affectionately goes by "Elsie". My grandmother has one of the sweetest hearts of anyone on this earth, and though she has nothing, she would give all of herself if you needed it. I am so happy that a part of my grandmother will live on in Natalie even after my mammaw is no longer with us.

And thus begins the pink mayhem of clothing, nurseries, wash clothes, and bows in our little (but expanding!) family. Don't worry, if you know me, you know I will still manage to get some blue thrown in as much as possible!